Back on track !!

So I am here again after three strange but good weeks in Sweden I am back in Argentina. The first days was really terrible, because I suffered from really hard homesickness that I didnt thought would be possible.

My body felt like it was made of iron and I couldn't get the hand on anything. I just did not want to do anything. Just lie in the bed and sleep, cry and do nothing. I was just so tired and only the thought of going up in some trapece was just ridicoulus.

But after my first class since I came back here, in the silks wish I realized is what I actually really want to focus on in the circus practise, I don't care if it is really common or the thing that everyone use, I just love being up there, so who cares what other people think?

Aerial in general is what my heart goes fast for. And to combine this with performance art, with dance, and maybe theatrical elements are my dream.

That is What I want to do!

(and a bunch of other things of course, I am a multicoulored artist, but in the world we are living it is almost a most to make a living, hey?)

Well, so after my first class and some endorphins later, I started to see things in color again. And life didn't seem that miserable anymore. And this morning, I went out for a run, bought that adapter that makes me able to charge my computer again so that I can write this post, and watching some of the recent news on facebook I came across my aerial teacher in Ireland and she had put up a video on her website that really made my heart go faster and THAN I realized, why the hell the reason was that I came here!!

Because I love this, and I want to make art, I just want to practise as well. To get the strength and maybe some inspiration to make my own work. To find others that loves the same thing..
So here I am, in Argentina, far from everything, but still in peace and with love all around, doing my thing. What I want. With a purpose again. I just have to make it happen!!

Life is to short to wait for, just grab it and start living.

http://emilyaoibheann.com/

Hairy stuff

..so I buried a heart tonight and it all came true

We were all in this together, you can not try to find your way out of this now. It's too late for that now.
But I promise it will be worth it.

Hold my hands like that first time near the river. We dance under the stars and watch the sunrice behind those mountains. And I will die for you.

When we wake up from this dream of ours their will be no fears in the darkness, there will be no faces in the shadows. Only water drops on the top of your lips.

Lets do a groovy, lets dance the night away..

I miss contact improvisation so much. But soon I'll be dancing tango and maybe salsa as well, I guess I have to let that be some kind of replacement.

I have some small changes that I want to make happen, I want to try make a  30 minutes a day purpose to myself, 30 minutes to practise spanish, 30 minutes to write on my novel, 30 minutes to work on my webpage, 30 minutes to practise juggling, 30 minutes to practise other things, 30 minutes to do meditation.

Or creative stuff.. The only problem is that now we are all ready up in 3 hours, and that is probably more than I have every day, so I have to prioritise, and maybe make things every second day, and make a nice little schedule of it.
Because there is too many things that I want and wish I had the time to do.

And now its time for bed goood night.. !!

Oh yes its real and it is fresh. Sometimes when I look down on my legs and I am with people that are maybe not that used to see real body hair In Real Life so to speak, than I think.. oh., i shit I wonder what they are thinking now, maybe they think its ugly, this goes for maybe one second in my brain, but than I say:
HEY ! Stop, why do I care! If they do not like it, they certainly do not like me for the person that I am, and they would not be with me. Or with other words they could just fuck off, and leave.. !
No but seriously, I really think it is so booooooooooooooooring to shave, shave, shave.. yes. Why should I do something that is so boring and that actually grow back again in like a day. Which means I have to do it all over again.. I feel sorry for all those dudes out there who have to suffer with their beards every fucking day. (im sorry for the language) but it most be incredible irritating.. I just say let it GROW!
(but actually I am a little jelous as well, I have always had a secret dream of having a nice little red mustasch and beard someday.. oh I would look so pretty!)

Circus world of wonder

Everyday life in Argentina

Det är såhär det känns, sähår det ska vara.

This is how it should feel, this is how I feel. I know so little, but anyway so much. We are all very strong. Very sensitive. 

Every day life in Argentina. 

Everything here is so different from Europe and still so much the same. Its autumn now, but the flowers are still in bloom.

There are nothing really called recycling here. There are starting up, people who have their own compost, and more healthy thinking, with less meat are also growing bigger. In my school the nutrition thinking are very big, but still there is a lot of people eating a big amount of meat every day and drink large amounts of soda drinks, like coca cola.

But they who lives in houses like me, put their cartons aside from the normal garbage (and the garbage you put in a little basket that sits on a tree) because every now and than there comes people on horse rides that collects them, what they use it for, nobody knows.

I have meet a lot of wonderful people here. And what occurred to me the most is the hospitality of the people here. Most of the people I have meet here are so generous, opening themselves, and try to help you in any case they can. What ever problem you have, you will always find help somewhere!

I am training almost everyday, Monday to Saturday, which is really nice. I have probably never been this well trained ever before. And the teachers are really good and push you to your limits, until you can’t do it anymore. But in the same way its all about passion, and everyone who go to this school are there for a reason and we all help out on each other. In the practise everyone is the teacher and we teach each others, which also is a good way of learning. There is always such a good spirit around the school.

Another thing with Argentinean people they always share, if not a maté, a package of cockies, a fruit, if you look hungry there is almost certain soon someone there to give you something to eat. If you are around people that you know a little bit of course, maybe not on the street from a total stranger, but that could probably happened as well, I suppose.

To be a girl in Argentina is also very interesting, almost everywhere you walk there is someone shooting after you, honking at you, or something similar. As I still do not master the Spanish fully, I still don’t understand what they are saying me, and I try not to look to many men in the eyes when I’m walking on the street, just to avoid things like that.

But in the end I am really enjoying myself here. I am very happy that this dream came true. I think its not before now, when everything suddenly starts to settle down and make sense, that I really understood that I am actually really here!

I am in f*cking Argentina! And I am doing this. By myself and I training circus, I have meet so many wonderful people, and I will get to know more before this year is finished, and I am starting to get to know a whole new language..

WoW!

Thank you wonderful world, for giving me the opportunity to make all of this happened! I still fully believe that everything you want can come true as long as you believe –

And never stop believing!

Big hugs and kisses to all of you!

<3