A Lionheart

"Be strong Marina. Keep strong."
That is what everyone tells me. And have been telling me.
I am not sure that is what is the best.

People have also always told me
"You are so brave Marina!"
"You are so mature for your age"
"You are so free, such a free spirit!"

Why are you so free?

And I still can't answer this questions. I don't feel very brave. Or free. What now that means. But I would say that maybe the answer to why people think I am this brave. And maybe free.
I think that the answer to this is that I just look on things differently than other people might do. I am not brave, or at least not braver than anyone else.  And free, I don't even know what that means. I am free in the way that I am free to make my own chooses and that is what I am doing.
Maybe my chooses are in some peoples eyes brave, because I do things that common people in my age might not do. But my answer to that is that it isn't because I am brave, because I am just as scared, terrified sometimes, as anyone else. But I choose to look up on it in a different way. It is a must, it is just something I have to do, to rescover all of this things that I want to see.
And as Jonathan once said to "Skorpan" in the book "The Brothers Lionheart" written by Astrid Lindgren.
"If I do not do this I wont be anything more than a little filth"
And I guess that is what keeps me going, that and my stubbornness.


I do not know what is the best to do. Or what I really want.
Sometimes I just wish to be back in Sweden this instant. But in the same time, what would I do there? And as well.. it will be winter in Sweden soon. And God knows I have seen to much winter for awhile I do not wish to go through another one after doing two allready. Even if the winter in Argentina is lovely short and more like a long autumn in Sweden, has it been terrible cold, and I am so longing for the warm and sunny days and nights, the flowers and the green.

But soon soon comes the spring and thte warm sun and more happy days with this. I know and I Love and I See and Embrace.

Thank you Dad for letting me see and enjoy the beauty of the nature, to trust people for who they are. For trusting my instinct for what is right and what is wrong.
Thank you for being with me in my heart,


I miss you.

Back on track !!

So I am here again after three strange but good weeks in Sweden I am back in Argentina. The first days was really terrible, because I suffered from really hard homesickness that I didnt thought would be possible.

My body felt like it was made of iron and I couldn't get the hand on anything. I just did not want to do anything. Just lie in the bed and sleep, cry and do nothing. I was just so tired and only the thought of going up in some trapece was just ridicoulus.

But after my first class since I came back here, in the silks wish I realized is what I actually really want to focus on in the circus practise, I don't care if it is really common or the thing that everyone use, I just love being up there, so who cares what other people think?

Aerial in general is what my heart goes fast for. And to combine this with performance art, with dance, and maybe theatrical elements are my dream.

That is What I want to do!

(and a bunch of other things of course, I am a multicoulored artist, but in the world we are living it is almost a most to make a living, hey?)

Well, so after my first class and some endorphins later, I started to see things in color again. And life didn't seem that miserable anymore. And this morning, I went out for a run, bought that adapter that makes me able to charge my computer again so that I can write this post, and watching some of the recent news on facebook I came across my aerial teacher in Ireland and she had put up a video on her website that really made my heart go faster and THAN I realized, why the hell the reason was that I came here!!

Because I love this, and I want to make art, I just want to practise as well. To get the strength and maybe some inspiration to make my own work. To find others that loves the same thing..
So here I am, in Argentina, far from everything, but still in peace and with love all around, doing my thing. What I want. With a purpose again. I just have to make it happen!!

Life is to short to wait for, just grab it and start living.

http://emilyaoibheann.com/